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February 2016 Archives

Moving Forward, One Step at a Time

In the wake of my son's graduation from high school, I have been pondering the last 13 years. When my son was 5 - in fact, right before he started kindergarten - his father told me he was unhappy in our marriage and wanted to leave. I can only describe my feelings as total and complete devastation. The word "divorce" was not actually used. I know now that he could not bring himself to say it - at least, not at first.

Cost Differences in Litigation v. Collaborative Divorce

There are several different types of costs when a couple is divorcing: financial, emotional and relational. I have been witness to the phenomenon of how emotional and relational costs increase the financial outlay when a couple is divorcing, in turn depleting the family's resources. During my twenty-five (25) years of practice, I have watched the pain that couples go through - emotionally, relationally and financially - and more often than not, that toll is much higher in a litigation case versus a Collaborative case. When I looked at the difference in the legal fees in two of our firm's cases with somewhat similar facts, I was not surprised to see that the fees in the litigated case were thirty-three percent (33%) higher than the fees in the Collaborative divorce case.

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