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Working While Divorcing

Stress, stress and more stress. It's difficult to say how you will handle the complications that divorce brings until you are faced with the issue; however, you can focus on minimizing the "after effects" of the divorce process while at work.

You might think to yourself, "What's the big deal? I go to work and do my normal thing and get paid." If this is how you can actually work while going through a divorce, bravo! If this isn't you, and stress completely throws you for a loop, you may want to give the following suggestions a try.

Leave your baggage at the door.

Easier said than done but needed. Imagine yourself walking into work and right as you are about to walk in, you simply "drop" your "life baggage" at the door. It doesn't enter your work environment, allowing you to focus on your day. Of course, you have to pick it back up on your way out and deal with it, but during your work day, you don't.

Set boundaries.

Setting boundaries relating to your divorce can help you get through your day, and your boss will be happy you set them. Letting other things grab your attention at work does not allow you to focus on the job at hand. Lack of focus leads to mistakes, details become giant mountains to climb, and work is done at a slower pace. Setting boundaries so your attention is not taken away from your work could mean that you only check your personal email, voice mail messages, etc., only on breaks and during your lunch. Think about staying away from social media for a bit; Facebook has a wonderful feature where you can deactivate your account for a period of time and disable your notifications. Focusing on your work will only help you in the long run - think about the boundaries you could set and then set them.

There is a time and a place for feelings.

Work is hard enough while going through a divorce; don't let your feelings take over while at work. Simply put, do not take out your frustrations, hurt feelings, etc., on your coworkers, and definitely do not take them out on your supervisor. The feelings experienced during a divorce are, in my opinion, comparable to grieving a loss of a loved one. Irrational thoughts or feelings could translate into snide comments, delayed deadlines (which create more difficulties), coworkers thinking that you are unapproachable and the perception that you are not a team player. Put a cap on your personal feelings and remember: you are at work! No one deserves to be dumped on because you have personal problems. Your job (your livelihood!) could be on the line if you can't keep it in check and handle yourself as a professional. I would suggest letting your feelings take over during counseling sessions or at the gym - trust me, your coworkers will thank you for it!

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